I purged again...
I feel disgusting.
Washing down the puke breath.
Ew.
I feel disgusting.
I feel disgusting.
I feel disgusting.

FUCK...

so sick of feeling fat all the time,
so i'm doing something about it,
diet diet diet diet diet
burn the fat
erase the chub
excercise, no supersize
getting rid,
of this shit
feeling so alive, a win
now on my way to getting thin.

I have over 1,500 plays on last.fm of Britney Spears!!! i am too obsessed.

and lady gaga is a godess!

 HOLY CRAP!!! Britney from "Paris Hilton' My New BFF" is now Paris' NEW BFF! YAYYYYYY! 

I always thought Vanessa was just a crying baby that only got her way when she was pathetic looking.


BRITTANY ON THE OTHER HANDD....hot. not to mention REAL! Vanessa was a fake bitch. 

Britney or Brittany or Brittani or however you spell it <3

 Things need to change immediately in our fucked up society. I'm serious! I can't stand the fact that we are all so fricking judgemental about every little thing. I can't take it!

I posted a video on facebook not that long ago and apparently that made me gay. WHY?
Why must everything be gay or straight. why must kids my age put people down like this?
Why must everything be fucking torment.

I just want things to change so bad you don't even know. Does anyone else know how it feels to be tormented your entire life? "your a fag" "you're gay" "what a faggot".....it's what I hear everyday and I never even really ask for it either. I'm nice, quite, but yet i understand somewhat where they get their material. It's just I wish they would come up with some new "poke-funs" because i can't really stand hearing the same thing over and over and over and over. it's fricking insane. 

on the flip side my hair smells gorgeous. lawlz~

have a happy fricking thanksgiving p33pZ

i'm so fucking motherfucking pissed right now. I put on my favorite Foo Fighter's shirt on today and I just fucking realized something. (sorry for the language, I'm just really passionate about this), i've completely filled it out and I am like basically bursting out of it.

At the start of my freshman year of high school I weighed around 110-115...ish and it's now October of my Sophomore year and I weigh 120-130 pounds.........HOLY SHIT!!! I gained twenty pounds in a year! How fucking fat am I? I seriously though I recovered and everything from the bulimia and the anorexia but I guess I'm having some second thoughs. I know i'm not fat....and that's what's weird. I CAN'T STAND THAT I'M NOT SKINNY. I'm not FAT by any shake of the stick but I'm not skinny...some may argue that I am but I am seriously not AS skinny as I WAS. I want to be that skinny again. I think it is a much leaner, cleaner, and more meak look. Now I look like....well a jock.

HERE's my puberty list:

6th grade: growth spurt #1 + other things
7th grade: enhancement
8th grade: growth spurt #2 + enhancement + other things
9th grade: growth spurt # 3
10th grade: MAJOR growth spurt + other things


I really don't know if I can deal with this.
My shoulders have broadened.... my voice is deeper, i weigh 20 pounds more than I did in the last year....and i can't stop eating.



I'm so scared of becoming fat....please help.


4 day weekend so YAYZ for me. loves it.

i'm having the BIGGEST CRAVING OF MY LIFE for ruffles.......OMG!


help me withstand this.


the expanded edition of me,

NICK

xoxo

*a kiss a hug a caress a lovebite and a pat*

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does anyone else want to vote for PARIS!

GO PARIS. PARIS '08!