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so i'm doing something about it,
diet diet diet diet diet
burn the fat
erase the chub
excercise, no supersize
getting rid,
of this shit
feeling so alive, a win
now on my way to getting thin.
and lady gaga is a godess!- Location:UK
- Mood:
FACEBX - Music:The Answer - Britney Spears
---_---__---_---_--- fuck everyone whoever called me fat
i know that this illness will probably kill me but...i can't stop. IT SUCKS MAJOR ASS!
i'm sick with a really bad cold: i'm achey, i'm tired, and i have a headache!
LIFE SUCKS.
plus. with show choir this week i'm going to have absolutely no lfie whatsoever.
Tomorrow I perform at lunch time.
Tomorrow I have a play practice til 5
Tomorrow I have show choir practice from 8-10
MY LIFE BLOWS...I NEED TO STUDY MY TRIG!
i'm going to wallow in ENGLISH and TRIG homework and wish that I actually had a life. LIke the life before any of this bulimia shit, this self loathing shit, this fucking manic depressive shit, just plain shit in general.
SHIT.
- Location:hollywood, CA
- Mood:
sick - Music:Mmm Papi - Britney Spears
I always thought Vanessa was just a crying baby that only got her way when she was pathetic looking.
BRITTANY ON THE OTHER HANDD....hot. not to mention REAL! Vanessa was a fake bitch.
Britney or Brittany or Brittani or however you spell it <3
- Location:Hollywood, CA
- Mood:
bouncy - Music:My BFF - Paris Hilton
I JUST WISH MY BRAIN WOULD JUST SHUT OFF A
it's like "SHUT THE FUCK UP and GO TO BED"
<3 i'm such a skeeze
So i'm sooooo glad to be back at school. I don't exactly know why but I am. I guess it's because I'm one of those freaky people who are obsessed with a routine and need to stick to that routine or else they are crazy. AND NO I AM NOT SCHIZO, BIPOLAR, RETARD, or any other thing you might want to call me. I just like the feeling of learning. I haven't felt a craving for knowledge in a long time but my brain was basically begging for it last night so I was siked for school. I'm serious when I say that I always get absolutely no sleep on the day before a school week. My brain just doesn't work that way. IT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF.
it's like "SHUT THE FUCK UP and GO TO BED"
<3 i'm such a skeeze
So i'm sooooo glad to be back at school. I don't exactly know why but I am. I guess it's because I'm one of those freaky people who are obsessed with a routine and need to stick to that routine or else they are crazy. AND NO I AM NOT SCHIZO, BIPOLAR, RETARD, or any other thing you might want to call me. I just like the feeling of learning. I haven't felt a craving for knowledge in a long time but my brain was basically begging for it last night so I was siked for school. I'm serious when I say that I always get absolutely no sleep on the day before a school week. My brain just doesn't work that way. IT FUCKING PISSES ME OFF.
- Location:Hollywood, CA
- Mood:
tired - Music:Womanizer - Britney Spears
I posted a video on facebook not that long ago and apparently that made me gay. WHY?
Why must everything be gay or straight. why must kids my age put people down like this?
Why must everything be fucking torment.
I just want things to change so bad you don't even know. Does anyone else know how it feels to be tormented your entire life? "your a fag" "you're gay" "what a faggot".....it's what I hear everyday and I never even really ask for it either. I'm nice, quite, but yet i understand somewhat where they get their material. It's just I wish they would come up with some new "poke-funs" because i can't really stand hearing the same thing over and over and over and over. it's fricking insane.
on the flip side my hair smells gorgeous. lawlz~
have a happy fricking thanksgiving p33pZ
- Location:Vanityhood, CA
- Mood:
apathetic - Music:Love Story - Mariah Carey
i'm so fucking motherfucking pissed right now. I put on my favorite Foo Fighter's shirt on today and I just fucking realized something. (sorry for the language, I'm just really passionate about this), i've completely filled it out and I am like basically bursting out of it.
At the start of my freshman year of high school I weighed around 110-115...ish and it's now October of my Sophomore year and I weigh 120-130 pounds.........HOLY SHIT!!! I gained twenty pounds in a year! How fucking fat am I? I seriously though I recovered and everything from the bulimia and the anorexia but I guess I'm having some second thoughs. I know i'm not fat....and that's what's weird. I CAN'T STAND THAT I'M NOT SKINNY. I'm not FAT by any shake of the stick but I'm not skinny...some may argue that I am but I am seriously not AS skinny as I WAS. I want to be that skinny again. I think it is a much leaner, cleaner, and more meak look. Now I look like....well a jock.
HERE's my puberty list:
6th grade: growth spurt #1 + other things
7th grade: enhancement
8th grade: growth spurt #2 + enhancement + other things
9th grade: growth spurt # 3
10th grade: MAJOR growth spurt + other things
I really don't know if I can deal with this.
My shoulders have broadened.... my voice is deeper, i weigh 20 pounds more than I did in the last year....and i can't stop eating.
I'm so scared of becoming fat....please help.
4 day weekend so YAYZ for me. loves it.
i'm having the BIGGEST CRAVING OF MY LIFE for ruffles.......OMG!
help me withstand this.
the expanded edition of me,
NICK
xoxo
*a kiss a hug a caress a lovebite and a pat*
- Location:In your mom's extended cunt
- Mood:
sad - Music:Womanizer - Britney Spears
does anyone else want to vote for PARIS!
GO PARIS. PARIS '08!
- Location:Anaheim, California
- Mood:
HAHAH - Music:Got Me Going Crazy - Jonas Brothers
everything is pretty much ready and i'm actually not flipping out that much! is that a good sign?
signs :( love 'em hate 'em. all the same.
b/p free today. that's amazing. i still eat like i'm morbidly obese but I guess it's a start.
is it completely vain of me to hate myself for not having my bones stick out?? my parents of course think that that is weird but I just think that I am not complete without the ribcage. do any of you out there believe in bad omens?
Currently performing at the Audio Overload festival in Anaheim. I'm under a tent with a laptop as we speak.
be sexy and stab yourself with M-A-C lipstick
ciao bitches <33
- Location:Anaheim, California
- Mood: tired-happy
- Music:Leave Britney Alone - Chris Crocker
The bands are:
Jonas Brothers
Tokio Hotel
SuG
The latter of the three is a Japanese Bishounen-based visual kei/oshare band. I know that most of you have absolutely no idea what that means but still! I love SuG!
I started to feel all teary-eyed today but I ended up stopping and the depression just faded when I started listening to Monsoon by Tokio Hotel and Shelf by Jonas Brothers. I guess music really does soothe you after all. This should come on the CD. SuG - ANTI-DRUG.
I hope you guys all enjoy my journal as much as I do and will comment if you please. Ask me questions and I will post them in a journal like this one. Tomorrow is the day before my Sophmore year of High School and we all know that it's going to be INSANE! I am ambivalent when it comes to school but I love getting good grades (n3rD). I'm going to take all Honors courses AGAIN...what am I putting myself into? All honors courses and SHOW CHOIR, and DRAMA CLUB, andthenandthenandthen???
Life is full of crises and this is just a stupid BUBBLEGUM CRISES that mainly all teens face. (THE FEAR OF NOT HAVING ANY FRIENDS AT LUNCH). Of course the more popular kids have no fear of this...probably the more ascertive to as well...but it's been bugging me!
I just figured out that my homeroom is Study Hall.....:( it's a mixed blessing.
keep being sexy and lick a popsicle. (speaking of which i'm trying to get signed to a record label called Popsicle records.)
xo
NSPACEE
- Location:Carson, California
- Mood:Hello Kitty Hair Barrets
- Music:pikaLIFE - SuG
- Location:Carson, California
- Mood: cheerful
- Music:Eyelash Curlers & Butcher Knives (what's the difference?) - Jeffree Star
FIRST ACT ( * means favorite performance, ** means best performance)
The Journey Begins: Meet Marionetta, Columbina and the other zany characters of iL CiRCo! Standing 14' tall, Marionetta's gown is truly unique, as it features a puppet show of marionettes! Wildly inventive Columbina will add an extraordinarily playful and surreal element to your experience!
Chinese Poles: Requiring precise skill and accuracy, our artists display impressive aerial feats of climbing, spinning, flipping, and daring falls.
German Wheel: This dance of man and machine is a stunning act of agility that takes place within a giant wheel, controlled solely by his deft ability to physically manipulate and command the imposing structure.
Flying Man: In an almost surreal experience, our artist steps out of the mist into a billowing panel of fabric suspended from the ceiling and soars his body through the air, actually flying over the audience.
Him and Me: This Vaudeville-inspired comedy act is sure to have you laughing.
Duo Lyra: The artistry of the lyra includes graceful movement and magnificent contortion-like poses paired with toe-hangs and other difficult strength moves.
Meet Baby Electra: The comic Genius of Diane Wasnak. Baby Electra is Diane Wasnak's precocious inner child. Baby Electra disovers her "Papa" (a real audience member) and the two win the audience over with ehr hilarious routine.
Spanish Webs: A colorful whirl of climbing, spinning, fearless drops, shimmering costumes, mysterious lightning and ethereal music give this piece a heavenly sense of beauty and wonder.
SECOND ACT
Fast Track Tumbling: Propelled by a specially-designed trampoline, our talented acrobats and gymnasts will bound, leap, and fly across the stage in this exciting, high energy number.
*Rolla Bolla: Our master balancing artist who will captivate the audience when he stakcs metal cylinders of different sizes and attempts to balance on top.
Meet the Blue Boys: In this comedic segment, two hysterical "Blue Boys" take tot he stage in a hilarious sketch.
Duo Straps: Supported by two straps suspended form the ceiling, these artists boast superhero looks and strength as they soar through the air while performing amazing feats.
Hand Balancing: This strength and balancing act consists of numerous hand balancing movements that defy gravity and create a living statue right before your eyes.
**Contortion: training since she was three, this young girl can bend and balance in ways that one can only imagine. Not only will she astound you, she also manages to pull straight A's!
I don't know about you, but that was an amazing show. I hope people in Carson will see it. Tomorrow is their last performance! The food was great, and the show was great! Who could've asked for MORE?
- Location:Carson, California
- Mood: mmmHmmm
- Music:none
WHAT SHOULD I MUTHAFUCKIN' DO?
- Location:Carson, CA
- Mood: in pain!
- Music:none
I just wish I could be more appreciated for what I do...however little I do. It's summer...so i should just relax right???? WRONG! I can't do anything right anymore. I was sort of proud of myself today for being orderly today......and of course my mom has to say that my TEMPS ARE PUSHED BACK TIL OCTOBER! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUXCK!!!!!!!!!!!!
I"m a teenager and any teenager wants to get their license as soon as they possibly can.
I guess i'm gonna have to kiss their asses for 3 weeks before my temps are ready.
being a teenager can be such a bitch. i feel like i'm in debt for CREDIT FOR WHAT I DO!!
does anyone else share my misery?
- Location:Carson, California
- Mood: hellish
- Music:G-Slide (Tour Bus) - Lil Mama
- Location:tanning salon
- Mood: SUMMER f00Lz
- Music:none
- Mood:FCCC
- Music:Breathe On Me - Britney Spears
here's to an attempt at sleep.
- Location:sleepytown, ohio
- Mood: sleep deprived
- Music:Home - Belle (Beauty & the Beast)
-cookies
-cheezits
-cake
-candy
-chocolate!
i'm addicted to all of those. I hope i'm not turning to a COE now.
- Location:Wadsworth, Ohio
- Mood: bloated-stuffed-crust
- Music:Piece of Me (Boz o Lo Remix) - Britney Spears
LOVE YA GIRRRLS AND GUUUYS!
- Mood:artistic
- Music:Disappear - No Angels
